


Only 21

by imagreenbee



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Hurt, Love, M/M, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-17 08:40:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29222586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imagreenbee/pseuds/imagreenbee
Summary: But he guesses that’s what you do when you move on in life, you leave behind anything that might weigh you down..
Relationships: Lando Norris/Carlos Sainz Jr
Kudos: 24





	Only 21

Had Lando known what love was before? He didn’t think he did. There had been crushes, sure, the silly adolescent, childish crushes that never led to anything. They just consumed him for a few weeks and then he moved on. Silly.

And then there it was. There _he_ was. And he didn’t expect it, how could he? He was older, he seemed like a serious adult in Lando’s 18 year old eyes. He was mesmerizing, that’s what Lando thought when he first met him. The way he moved, the way he talked, he sounded like he knew what he was saying, his movements purposeful, strong. But then he turned around and looked at him with a warm smile on his face and he was suddenly a boy, his equal.

And that’s how their relationship evolved. They were equals, even with the five years between them sometimes reminding them that they shouldn’t be. They should be trying to one up each other, show each other they were better. And they did, on track they did. But then they held each other’s hand after a tough weekend or they stayed a little longer in the other’s hotel room after a good one, finding an excuse in “another drink to celebrate”.

And then the hours became whole days at his place, watching old races, talking about anything and everything, being together just to be together. And the days became nights and weeks and months. And it felt right. Lando was happy. He seemed happy too. It felt real and it was love. Lando was sure it was love.

But then he left that cold December and his words hurt. His words erased everything Lando thought was real. 

_“You are only 21, Lando, this is not your forever, how could it? You’ll find more people to love, you still have your whole life ahead of you. I don’t want to hold you back”_ , he’d said. And Lando was confused, where’d that come from? This was never a concern, they’d never talked about this.

But he guesses that’s what you do when you move on in life, you leave behind anything that might weigh you down and apparently that’s what Lando was, a weight, something to leave behind to become better.

And then he’s at the MTC in January and it’s still cold but he can’t find those warm eyes to look at him anymore. He goes about his day and he instinctively turns around a couple of times when he hears footsteps or a door closing. _“It’s Carlos, he’s here”_ his stupid brain tells him the first time. But it’s not, how could it be? He’s not here anymore. It’s like he’s in a different timeline by now, like he never existed in Lando’s life.

 _“It’s definitely him this time!”_ his brain offers again when he hears the main entrance door opening. But it’s not and his heart hurts again. He feels silly because there’s no way.

And then it happens again, he’s not thinking and it’s an instinct to turn around again when he hears the lift doors closing behind him, expecting to see the one his heart wants to see, but it’s not him. It’s Daniel. And he’s smiling that exuberant smile of his that’s even obvious behind the mask. It’s a new start for Daniel and he’s hopeful, happy, ready for a new challenge. 

And Lando can’t help but smile back an honest smile after what feels like an eternity since the last time he did. And he’s hopeful too, because he’s only 21.


End file.
